Anything from your past comes and haunts you often? Disturbs your mental peace and takes you to an uncomfortable ride of the emotional roller coaster where you become disconnected from your present. Feelings like guilt and remorse take over. It affects the quality of your life. Affects your mental health and further down the line, it also affects your physical health too. To forget one’s bitter past is not possible and God-forbid should not happen to anyone. If it happens it will be the biggest loss to a person. But then how to deal with your past? How to get the gems of experiences to enlighten the way further towards growth and glory.
Bygones Always Stays – Past Can Never be Erased
We can run from fire, flood, and disasters. But we can never run from ourselves. The ghosts of our deeds always come to haunt us, no matter how much loud we listen to music, the whisky we drink, the fake laugh we decorate on our lips. ‘Our Pasts’ have remained a part of our life and will always remain. We had written those moments on the dewdrops of time and they are immortalized in our memory forever. We’ll be carrying them in our continued consciousness in many future lives to come. Is it bad? No! Had it been bad, it would not have been designed by our ‘Creator’, in such a manner. We chose the deeds, we acted in a certain manner and we carry the impressions of our choices. What we are today, is the result of our past choices, be it good or bad. Wishing them to vanish into the abyss is not just ignorant but will increase the hurt multiple times. The good times haven’t stayed, similarly, the bad phase also won’t last.
Embrace Your Past
We all have our shares of blunders and mistakes. We all will slip into guilt and remorse if we focus too much on them. Life is happening to us while we are looking back. Life is neither in the past nor in the future. Life is right now, even when you are reading this piece of literature. But does that means, you should avoid thinking about your past? No, never do that. That will be more than the biggest mistake ever to be committed in your life. You lived those moments, you may have made bad choices or something bad has happened, but that has happened and consequences are there which no one can escape. Accepting the consequences, focussing on your growth, and taking the lessons to wise-up is the only way you can benefit from all this.
Blame Yourself for Your Own Good
I may sound a bit like taking an ethical high ground. But what if I tell you that I am taking the most selfish, practical, and profit-oriented approach. Yes, indeed I am. How? Personally, I have also committed many blunders in life, some unknowingly and many deliberately. Those which I had done in the flow of emotions or events, you’ll be surprised to know, that I was well aware of the consequences. Should I now run away, when my trial comes? Well, the question does not matter, because no one can run from the trial of conscience. Even you tried to run from yourself and failed. See even you cannot beat yourself. Congrats. If it was your undoing, then you should stand up and correct the situation and swim against the tide, no matter how much effort is needed to be commanded. You are not a ‘Tree’, you are dynamic. Make an effort and move the mountain. Blame yourself. Why? Because if I am the cause of my sorrows, then only I can set them right. Let the locus of control come to your domain. Once you make yourself the sea-master, then you have the power to set for course correction. How can you correct a wrong which is not done by you? Think over it.
Your Past is The Burning Wood – The Fuel to Launch Your Tomorrow
You had your moments, you screwed. You feel guilty. Hey! good thing. You are still alive and that makes you eligible enough to act and set things right. The past has happened. It is there to empower us. We know certain things – the experience. The richness of experience makes us wise and mature. Poor are those people who cannot retain the learning of their past. For them, it is not past, it is a loop, an unending loop. Rich are those, who learn from the past and set the sail of the future. They may have burned the bridges in the past, but now they have learned to keep the lifeboats ready. They are more fail-proof than any other system in the world. The universe is ever-expanding, so are you with your capabilities and ambitions. Past is the fuel that lets you take off. The fuel of experience and maturity lets you know the right course, duration, and flight path. Happy journey. When you shine from above, don’t forget to say ‘Hi’ to me.
Rise and Rise
Rise for being the human you are. You are not the proverbial ‘Phoenix’ bird, who rises from the ashes. You cannot be burned to ashes. Your capabilities and willpower are for steel forges to set destiny in the right mould. Dance of destiny is for the lower animals, better control the orchestra. It will take effort, time, and skills. They are not gifted to anyone. The sweat of the brow is needed to purchase it. Plus the tax of patience is too high. Make the payment and wield the weapon. I remember some movie dialogue which said, “Every day above the ground is a good day”. Make every day and every breath count. Take time to enjoy, to see the leaves fall, the bird’s chirp, and don’t miss that sunrise, it shines for you every day wanting you to ‘Rise’.
Burn and Burn Out – Don’t Fade Away: Wipe those Tears
Life is more about doing and less about wishing. All the crap media advice is about the power of dreams. So the misdirected youth falls into the abyss of hopelessness and empty rhetoric. It’s the good old ‘Karma’ (deeds) advice. Remember ‘work’ not ‘wish’. I haven’t seen anything being achieved from wishing but have seen man reaching the moon and now preparing for mars by astute planning, execution, and the tons of hard work put in. But in all those efforts there were many failures and re-tries. People must have felt disheartened and dejected. But carried on like the beasts of burden with the efforts backed by intelligence and improvements in every re-trial. It’s your own life. Stop wishing and start doing. The greatest sorrows of the past can be drowned in the efforts of today. Tears will bring you sympathy but won’t change your status quo. The truth of human life is degradation, we have to work twice hard to keep ourselves updated and relevant, otherwise, only decay can be achieved by inaction. It is better to be always in the path of progress and continuous improvement rather than to be like a piece of sitting furniture and decay.
Be in Harmony with the Pulse of the Clock
Time is relative. But time is not the healer. It is you who’ll heal. Plenty of medical prescriptions are placebos, it is you who do the magic. You manifest on this planet to grace other people with the spark of your existence. Your struggles will be lessons for the generations to come, your generosity will be remembered across your own bloodline. Your success will be an inspiration for your friends. The way you’ll defeat your enemies will be a courageous lesson for your followers. Be the most important person in your life. Value your past. It is a treasure trove of emotions. Churn it with the tool of introspection. Meditate to calm your mind and exercise to keep your body ready for action. Be the hero of your life and rescue yourself from the rivers of sorrow and tears. Be a harbinger of peace, health, and happiness to people around you. Past is a teacher which will punish if you are not learning the lesson but will reward you if you are a good student. It’s not the past, but how you perceive it.
Yesterday I was clever, so I wanted to change the world. Today I am wise, so I am changing myself.RUMI
Share Your Past Selectively
Sharing is caring. Too much sharing is inviting disasters. Oh! Am I being the bad boy here? Ah! They’ll say that I know, whom they cannot fool is labeled as ‘bad boy’. I accept all the labels, if that makes you happy, if not, then suit yourself. Yes, that’s the mirror of life. Sharing your past means sharing the lessons with those who value you and hold you in high esteem. They could be your siblings, children, or likewise. They value how you wised up and learn the lessons and imbibe them in their life dealings. But if you overshare, you are blocking them to commit their share of mistakes and opportunities to learn from the lessons unique to them. Plus sharing with everyone else makes you a laughing stock or exposes the vulnerability in your past to your rivals. Who knows, the friend of today is the fri(d) end of the future? They can use your past mistakes as a tool to damage your image or to demotivate you. Lessons of the past are hard-earned with precious tears and heavy heartbeats. Don’t waste them like some bag of potato chips. Enough of sharing advice. Treasure them and protect them like hard-earned wealth.
Don’t Try to Bury Your Past
Yes, don’t try to bury your past. Or else the zombies of the memories will visit you forever. Making peace with the past does not mean trying to forget it or neglect it. Remember, unsorted issues will keep popping up every now and then. You will be needing to confront them at some point in time. It is your life and you need to detangle it yourself. No one else can do it for you. Some losses you have to accept so that you can free your mind for present effort in order to generate future gains. You don’t need to confront yourself or your own emotions. Leave this competing attitude. No need to compete with oneself. Give space to grow and expand. No need to give time to heel. Heeling will not take place unless you’ll take some action. Start cultivating new positive things with lessons learned from the past. Be the improved version of yourself. Let your past be your teacher instead of being the tormentor.
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Cherish your past and make your scars the memory of the battles you fought and survived. Battle scars are the ornaments of the warriors, the doers, and the movers. Past is there to lighten your way to the future. Don’t close your eyes. It’s your opportunity to wise-up, don’t close the window. Let this article, ‘Don’t Run Away From Your Past – Make Peace With It‘, open the doors for the winds of change to come in.